Monday, June 4, 2012

Navi's thoughts: Symptoms and signs of a healer who shouldn't be healing

 
I saw Matticus' post on WoWInsider - 6 signs healing is not for you.  And immediately to mind came a whole host of ridiculous things that I wanted to reply to his post, but it's so goddamn difficult to post replies on WoWInsider that it's much easier if I just write it here myself and have a giggle.

These are the 6 signs that healing is not for you, according to Matticus:
  1. You spend more time DPSing than healing
  2. You aren't very quick
  3. You're unhappy
  4. Your skin isn't thick enough
  5. You're too mentally fatigued
  6. You have zero patience
If you ask me, this person sounds, unfortunately, like a low self esteem teenager with anger management issues.  In fact, that list above, could apply to a tank.  Except substitute point 1's healing for tanking.

From Nerfnow.com - oh right you can see it up in the top left corner.
So I had to make my own list about 6 signs healing is not for you.  And because I'm not on WoWInsider or have a ton of readers, nor do I have anyone who reads my blog that is easily offended, I don't have to be politically correct about it.
  1. You have a personality clash with all the tanks in the guild or raid, and you'd rather see them dead than have to heal them.
  2. Other people have told you about more spells to heal with than you actually had on your bar (I think everyone who raided in this guild in LK knows who I am talking about).
  3. You think it's OK to AFK to alt tab and check the footy scores in the middle of a boss fight (LOL I had to put this in because hunters can do this)
  4. You don't like wearing dresses because that's what all holy/resto gear seems to look like (OMG, I think I've just realised why a lot of healing toons are female.. or blood elves)
  5. If warlocks in your raid/group are doing more healing than you.
  6. You're blind.  All those blind guys that play WoW are DPSers.  What does that tell you.  However, you can be deaf and be a good healer.  It will probably make you a better healer if you're deaf, because you don't have to listen to everyone on Vent saying stuff like
    • "I'm dead" - like I can't see that.  I am a healer you know.
    • "I need heals" - see the "I'm Dead" comment.
    • "Battle rez me, battle rez me.  I asked you to rez me" - If I haven't rezzed you it's because you're not important or because I'm actually busy doing something, like healing.

18 comments:

  1. Hey.

    Dude Priests wear a KILT :P.

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    1. @Matticus - if you're a shaman or druid, that's true! If you're a priest, you're wearing a robe. If you're a paladin.... it's definitely a dress :D

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    2. I think we need to review our wardrobe definitions... I like "kilt" as long as we understand going commando is mandatory. "Dresses" are level one items that cannot be transmogged. "Robes" are time-honored vestments of the highest significance. Tomato, tahmahto

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    3. Dresses are the unfortunate consequences of having the most noble healers wearing plate but everyone else not giving two hoots and not feeling they are worth their own artwork. *sigh*. And not wantig to be shown up by your healer looking better than the tank :D

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  2. Healing is a thankless job and I'm glad I don't have to do it.

    Ayelena

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  3. I disagree with point 3 - it should be ok as long as you're quick! :P

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. says the one who always had me on follow and then asks me to fill him in on the strat... or just says he wasn't listening

      And @matticus it is a dress :)

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  4. Yeah, see, that's why I haven't ever tried to heal, I have four out of six on the list. I do have patience with children and animals, however they never seem to show up in instances so it doesn't help.

    And I have been asked for a battle rez but I'm usually already dead or I would do it. I think I've successfully done it once of which I was rather proud!

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  5. I've seen #5 far too often... o.O

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  6. @Ayelena - lucky for you I'm around!
    @bel - lol true!
    @TotA - 4 of mine or Matticus's? I can't imagine you're blind or not getting along with people. You made me laugh about children and animals in instances... :)

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  7. The ones on his list:

    You spend more time DPSing than healing
    You aren't very quick
    Your skin isn't thick enough <---
    You have zero patience

    That's me!

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  8. I had great delight reading this post.

    Still hasn't put me off (stay tuned)

    Oh and Navi! in regards to point 2...less is more!

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  9. @Faith - I look forward to you joining my healing crew! Gosh, I may not be leader of that crew next expansion /cry

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  10. Why is it I dont fit the cliche? Am I not suited to healing? ):

    Voe

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